ComPortOne Book Review
From Pain to Peace
Help for Parents with Wayward Children
Sharon Clonts & Janice Chalker
From Pain to Peace is essential for Christian parents with children who are not perfect and occasionally make bad choices (And frankly that's all of us!) This book encourages growth, love, self-appreciation and acceptance. It give consolation to parents, who after parenting the best they could still had children who stray from the church and God.
At times we get discouraged when it seems as though our prayers for help are going unanswered. Yet, clearly, that is not the case. These are His children first. Heavenly Father loves them. He knows what will awaken them. He know when they will best respond. We must put our trust in Him.
- Feelings of guilt arising from the waywardness of one's child do not emanate from our Father in Heaven.
- Father in Heaven is aware of your struggle; he loves you and values you for your righteous endeavors.
- You must maintain your own spiritual integrity, particularly during this difficult time.
- Children have free agency [the right to choose] and will use it.
- Your job is to teach the correct principles. Your child's job is to grasp them.
- If you have done your job, even imperfectly, stop beating yourself.
"Throughout scripture we encounter the need for us to remember that the Lord has His own timetable for unfolding things; it will not always accord with our schedule or our wants. When, in our extremities, we urgently call for a divine response, there may be, instead, a divine delay. This is not because God, at the moment, is inattentive or loves us less than perfectly. Rather, it is because we are being asked, at the moment, to endure more for the welfare of our souls." Elder Neal A. Maxwell. Meek and Lowly Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1987, p. 89
An important principle of the gospel - FREE AGENCY - the freedom to choose ones own path is covered in detail in the book. All of us [inlcuding our children] have the freedom to choose to serve and obey God or to choose to follow the ways of the world. When our children are young, we teach them respect and obedience. As they mature, they will learn that with free agency comes consequences and responsibility.
From Pain to Peace encourages us to remember that in order to be able to lift and assist another, we must be on higher ground. We cannot allow ourselves to lose spirituality and hope by wallowing in guilt or self-pity. Again, it is our job to teach our children - it is their job to grasp it.
Filled with thought-provoking scriptures - reading From Pain to Peace will be an emotional experience that fills one with hope and understanding . I recommend it to anyone with children who are struggling to find themselves [and God].
I personally love this book. Anytime I feel frustrated I open it and read it again [when I can find it - others have borrowed it so often.]
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